Twilight: the ultimate battle between fantasy and feminism

It is hard to be a feminist and a Twilight fan.

Seriously. I was discussing this with one of my friends, who is a total closet case when it comes to Twilight for that very reason. Twilight pulls you in and is so entertaining, and it also goes against all of my feminist sensibilities. Bella is all a-twitter over this guy she thinks is perfect, and when he leaves she becomes this hollow basketcase, as if she weren’t a full human being before Edward came along.

My friend and I were also discussing this Team Edward vs. Team Jacob issue. We both agreed that there are aspects of Edward that are completely Victorian: he controls her behavior under the pretense of “keeping her safe”, he leaves her desolated and alone, and then when he comes back he pressures her into getting married. I’m sorry, what decade do we live in?

Then there’s Jacob. Ah, both my friend and I sighed at the very mention of his name. Let’s put aside the fact that Taylor Lautner is completely dreamy (seriously, I haven’t had a schoolgirl crush this bad since Zac Hanson). Jacob is just freaking awesome. I didn’t used to feel this way about Jacob – the way I saw it, both Jacob and Edward were both just macho chauvinist boys each trying to mark Bella as their territory (get it? Dog, werewolf? Eh, whatever) But when I looked at my own life experiences, I realized that Jacob is Bella’s friend, he is there for her when Edward is not, he treats her like an equal, the way that she deserves. And she completely disregards him for Edward. I believe this scenario is all too familiar: nice guys finish last.

Here’s my point: why do we socialize girls to think that the boys who hurt us, who leave us and make us cry are the ones we are supposed to be with? Twilight isn’t the only culprit, either – you see it all over female-targeted media (Grey’s Anatomy definitely comes to mind.) In the most extreme cases, these patterns of relationships can lead to domestic violence and patriarchal terrorism.

Please don’t get me wrong, I still love the Twilight series and I’m certainly not accusing Stephanie Meyer of promoting relationship abuse. She just wanted to write an entertaining series and she does a damn good job of it. But I think as women we need to remind ourselves that it’s fantasy – it isn’t real, Edward doesn’t exist and if he does we should avoid him at all costs and realize the true value of the Jacobs of this world – men who treat women like equals, with tenderness and utmost respect.

All that being said, I’m seriously looking forward to New Moon coming out in November and seeing Taylor Lautner’s half-naked body for most of the movie (am I objectifying him? Maybe a little).